BARREN WOLF// PART 1

KOOKS, they're running the asylum.  I live with one everyday.   He stands 6 foot even, and the things that come out of his mouth make my head spin.  He seems not to be dazzled by real life.  He wakes only at night, wandering the streets like a vampire looking for his next victim.  Snow white hair and blue eyes, he stalks the f**king night. My sister was his first casualty.  They were an item before she found out his only ambition in life was to wash dishes at the finest truck stops in town. When he got his wish at 'Gay and Oil', she threw his clothes into the street. So I took him in, what a day that was. On his first night he said "I will boil some eggs for the tuna fish."  I should have known better, but just then my blackberry explodes.  It's my sister yelling at the top of her lungs, "NO YOU DIDN'T TAKE THAT WORTHLESS S**T INTO YOUR HOME!!!!" Before I can reply BARREN WOLF comes running from the kitchen yelling "the eggs are on FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I call 911 the firemen respond, their water and hoses everywhere. The firemen look at me and say "WHAT THE F**K HAVE GUYS BEEN SMOKING, WEED???????" As they leave, I look over in the corner, there sits barren wolf with a can in his hands, all he says is, "WANT SOME TUNA???"