I know I haven't written for a few years now, but I know you haven't forgotten me. Remember, I'm the eclectic girl who loved everything Barbie, and the awesome suede cowboy boots, my Dr. Seuss books, and the toy machine gun with the built in rat-tat-tat so I could play cops and robbers with my older brothers.
I thank you for all the wonderful Christmases past.
That being said, I am hoping you will consider gifting some of the needier on the planet. These are just some suggestions, but I know you'll do what's best.
The President of the United States - Strength to always follow his convictions and do whats best for all
Republicans - a conscience
Democrats - backbones
Dick Cheney - a one way ticket to Nigeria
The Middle east - the courage to lay down their arms and treat their neighbors with dignity and respect
Manufacturer's of goods that are 100% made in the U.S. - a significant job creation incentive
Non Voters - a month long vacation to one of the following locales: Cuba, China, or Korea.
Members of the Teabaggers Party - A gift certificate for all expenses paid future nursing home care. (must be redeemed at location where 75% of CNA's and orderly jobs are filled by minorities)
George W. Bush - A new job as U.S. ambassador to Afganistan,
Sarah Palin - Magazine subscriptions to "Parents", "National Geographic", and "Animals Voice"
Art Bell (coast to coast radio show) - The opportunity to return with his wife and child back to the U.S. and live
Julian Assange - Freedom from persecution and prosecution.
Servicemen and women (from every country) stationed around the world - A chance to spend Christmas at home with their loved ones
The Pentagon - A personal visit from Gail Vaz-Oxlade and a massive dose of her budgeting expertise
Returning Govenor Jerry Brown (Calif.) - shovels to help with the massive cleanup
Arizona Govenor Jan Brewer - a gift certificate that covers the cost of any future organ transplants (only good in mexican hospitals and donor must be latino).
Bill Gates and Warren Buffet - double the number of wealthy who have signed "The Giving Pledge"
The Hungry - food for every meal
The ill - Medical care without restrictions or qualifications
The thirsty - endless safe drinking water
The homeless - a safe place to sleep and a base from which to relaunch their lives
All the children of the world - a person or family who loves, protects, and cherishes them
I know its a long list, but I thank you in advance for reading my letter. Well I better go, you have a lot more reading to do. Take care, and I look forward to your visit later this month.
P.S....Your cookies and milk will be in the usual place.
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