Happy Friday all! It’s another beautiful day out on Long Island and I should be at the beach….maybe later… There’s been lots of things going on the past few days and lots of catching up to do, so here goes nothing…





My House



Crisis averted



Last week, I shared some disturbing news about a mortgage escrow statement I received in the mail. It had said that I either had to come up with almost $5000 or have my mortgage payment go up by $400 a month, neither of which I can afford. I thought I was going to lose my house, and even though I do eventually want to, I don’t want to lose it that way.



Anyway, to make a long story short, I made a few phone calls last week and the bank investigated the escrow account, finding three errors on their part. In the end I may even end up having a surplus in my escrow. Now it looks like I’m going to be able to stay here…for now. Whew!





Photo Source: Just Jared



Crazy Stupid Love



I went to the movies the other night only because it starred Ryan Gosling, the hunky actor who my buddy Rich told me about. The movie is called “Crazy Stupid Love,” and it stars Gosling, Steve Carell, and Julianne Moore. The movie was okay, but boy was my friend right about Ryan Gosling! Absolutely gorgeous in every way and well worth the price of admission!





Photo Source: blamonet



Circus Wednesday



I’m almost getting to the point where I know I’m going to start missing going to Circus on Wednesdays once school starts. Once again, I had a fabulous time and I’m making new friends. It really is a special place, so if you’re a PLU (People Like Us – or rather “Me”!) and you live on Long Island, you should definitely check out the Lizard Lounge in Bohemia on a Wednesday evening.





Ms. Ruby Diamond in action at Circus



That’s what friends are for



They say a person is lucky to have one or two good friends in their life. I’m starting to find out that although I thought I had just a couple, there are others who either are or have the potential to be true friends, and I feel very blessed to have each of them in my life.



Lisa



This summer I’ve met a few good people with potential for long-lasting friendships and one of them is Lisa. I’ve mentioned Lisa before. She’s the woman that remembered me from religion class way back in the 2nd grade, about 40 years ago. Though I actually first met her again last year, I’ve spent a lot of time with Lisa this summer and I’m starting to enjoy her company more and more.



We had a good time over at the Grove last week and I even drove her home. She’d told me she owned a barber shop and I had promised her a visit there, which I made this week. What a nice place she has! It’s called Hats Off and it’s kind of in between an old fashioned barber shop and a beauty salon, nicely decorated and very comfortable. Lisa made me feel so welcome when I got there, telling the whole crowd of people waiting how we met, and I’ve got to say she gave me probably the best haircut of my life!



Rita



Rita is a fellow teacher in my school district. We’ve known each other a couple of years and have grown to be good friends. I hadn’t realized until I had breakfast with her yesterday just how much I missed her not being around. What started off as what should have been an hour breakfast turned into a three-plus hour talkathon. Love ya Reet!



Ozzie



Ozzie is one of the newest people in my life and I’ve already spoken of him a few times in this space. We don’t know each other well enough yet, and I haven’t been sure just what kind of place he’d take in my life, but I think I’m starting to figure it out. We were supposed to go to Splash together last night, but at the last minute he couldn’t make it. He did figure into the night though, when all was said and done…



When you least expect it, expect it!



Every once in awhile I‘ve wondered what it would be like to run into him again. I couldn’t imagine how I’d react, and now a day later I know. Just like in our old days together I feel like I always either do or say the wrong things concerning him and last night was no exception.



It’s funny, for the past several weeks I haven’t gone out alone and yesterday I almost had a car-full. I was kind of hoping to go alone for a change and things seemed to align themselves for this most unexpected purpose for I did end up going alone and for the first time since January, I bumped into him, and it wasn’t pretty.



All I will say about it is that I was standing on the dance floor at Splash and spotted him. He’d already seen me and was coming my way. I don’t know why, but I just turned in the other direction and started walking away. It was just a gut reaction and of course, it wasn’t a good one. In the long run we did speak a little, but I think both of our nights were kind of soured and definitely uncomfortable afterwards. I told him later on that I wish I had a redo, and that’s the truth!



A Developing Friendship



During the evening I texted Ozzie to tell him that I wished he was there with me. I was uneasy and I could’ve used someone to talk with and dance with. After a couple of texts back and forth, he told me to come through on my way home, which I did. Since he’s new in my life and doesn’t really know about this particular history of mine, he was a good person to talk to. I got to his house around 3:30 and we talked for at least a couple of hours. I went home feeling much better.



In all I’m learning that even though he’s got this public persona and has a lot of acquaintance ‘friends,’ he is really a genuine person beneath it all and I’m really glad I met him. I think he was brought into my life for a purpose and little by little I’m starting to believe ours will be an enduring friendship. So for like the umpteenth time, thank you Oz!



The Department of Health comes a calling



Yesterday I received an email from a guy at the NY State Department of Health. He said that he wanted to speak to me regarding some articles I’d written on Examiner. He’s with the HIV/AIDS area of the department and I have done some pieces on the subject, so I’m sure those are what he wants to talk to me about. Right now I’m waiting for a phone call from him and I’m a little nervous as to what this is about. Stay tuned…



Well, I think I’m all caught up now. If you’re still reading this, I want to both thank you and apologize for giving you so much to read. I’m always humbled by how many people are following this blog and I hope that whatever I put in here, whether it be cool music or my silly, innocuous personal stories, gives people some entertainment, perhaps a few laughs, and lots of smiles. My friend Michael even gave me a nice shout-out on FB this morning, telling others in a comment to read my blog, so thank you Michael!



Here’s a Robyn song to mark how I’m feeling right about now. Yes, what’s past is past and no one can go back and change it, but if only to dream…







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Well, it’s another blazing Monday and the start of a brand new week. I’ve got four weeks left in my first summer off and I just know they’re gonna go by sooooo fast. Normally by the time summer ends I’m ready to go back, but I’m not so sure about this year. I had a really busy weekend, which worked great for distracting me from the issues of my house. Here’s a little recap:



An impromptu barbie and then off to the Grove



Since our friend Rose has been in town for a party, we all decided to go to Cherry Grove on Saturday night. He hadn’t been there in years and so we planned on spending the evening there. I had had a barbecue the night before and I had a lot of leftover food, so I invited Rose, Blanche and Dita over for a pre-Fire Island barbecue. It was a nice start to a really fun night.



We all headed out on the 7:20 from Sayville and got to the Grove a little before 8. The weather wasn’t as nice as it had been in previous weeks, but that was okay. Though we started off at the Ice Palace, we soon headed to Cherry’s because they were hosting a 1971 class reunion of what looked like mostly straight people. They were playing disco music and we were hard pressed to find any guy-guy or girl-girl couples.



I know it brings money to the place, but straight people have enough places to go without invading our territory. It seems that every year the place attracts more and more straight people, and honestly it’s annoying that what’s been our summer playground for years and years is slowly becoming an unrecognizable shadow of its former self.



Fun and Creepers at Cherry’s



In all Saturday was a really fun night. We were joined over there by Eddie’s sister and nephew, who were both very pleasant, and the good company made for an enjoyable evening, despite the rain that came for a short time. My new buddies Lisa and Laurie were there, and eventually they joined our circle of dancing fools. Even Rich, who has two sore feet and doesn’t always like to dance, was wiggling and giggling all night long with the rest of us.



One creepy aside to the evening were these two guys, Alfonse and Billy, who used to be a couple back in the day, but are now best friends who often go out together. I remember Alfonse from back then. He was one of those classically good-looking guys who turned heads wherever he went and his looks haven’t waned. I never caught his eye, or so I thought until Saturday. Apparently he did notice me.



“I had the biggest crush on you twenty years ago,” he whispered in my ear on the dance floor the other night.



“Gee, then why didn’t you ever say so back then,” I thought. Call me cynical, but I’m not so sure I believed him. I found out on Saturday, as did my other friends, that Alfonse is a very forward acting sort of creeper who seems to take whatever he wants without asking. Though he had done so once before a couple of weeks ago, what he did on Saturday was ten times worse. Almost from the moment he said that to me, he started groping and feeling his way around my person like he was feeling for a ripe melon in the produce section at the supermarket.



The groping and kissing and hugging continued as he and Billy came over to our group and Fonzi plied similar moves towards my other friends. What a creeper! I’m actually glad he never told me about his “crush” back in the day!



Dinner and dance therapy in the city



Last night I met my friend Ivan in the city for some dinner and dancing. At first I was planning on just dinner, but dance therapy is still in order, so after a nice Thai dinner and some good conversation, we ended up at Splash. We were supposed to try this place downtown called “Greenhouse,” but we missed the open bar at ten and since it’s really expensive there was no other place we could think of to go to dance. We promised to make a date to go, though, before the end of the summer. I heard it’s hella cool!



Splash was alright, for a Sunday night. We got there during their weekly Amateur Strip Contest, which was okay. A funny thing was that the drag queen hosting the show was the same one from the Sea Tea the week before and this other really strange dude from the ride was there, too. He’s a tall, bearded, leather daddy kind of dude, with sparkling high heeled pumps and green, glittery makeup. Only in New York!



Anyway, once the show was over and a winner had been announced, they opened up the dance floor and Ivan and I danced our asses off for the next hour and a half. Mission complete! All was good and now it’s Monday morning and the distractions are gone. Now it’s time to think…



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Today is Thursday, almost the end of another summer week and we just keep rolling along fast. It hasn’t taken me long to fall into the stay-up-late/wake-up-late mode, I’ll say. I think the earliest I’ve gone to sleep this week has been around 2:30 AM, and that was early. The only thing I don’t like about it is that I’m missing my mornings, because that’s when I usually get a lot of writing done. Now, by the time I write and post my “Song of the Day,” I’m lucky if it’s noon, and then it’s either keep writing (which I need to do) or get stuff done. It’s a daily struggle, lol.



Circus Wednesdays

A few weeks ago I mentioned this guy I met that night I went to Alfie’s Bar in Patchogue. His name is Ozzie and we became friends of Facebook soon after we had met. I actually mentioned this a little this morning, but Ozzie is also a drag performer known as Ruby Diamond and he’s the weekly hostess at Circus Wednesdays, which I’d never been to. I promised Ozzie I’d be there, dressed in pink (they were having a “Pink Party”), and I was.

I have to say I was really impressed with the place. All of these years I’ve passed it by and never gone in, I never would have guessed it was so nice. The décor, the atmosphere, the bartenders…all stellar, and the crowd had quite a few familiar faces, too, though like many Long Island bars, the clientele is pretty clickish. Jay Antonio, the guy who runs the place is an awesome guy...he came over and introduced himself, bought me a shot, and I could tell that he's really intoo his clientele and they all like him a lot, too! Of course, being Ruby’s guest got me in with the cool crowd, and I have to say I really enjoyed myself. Thanks Ruby…I think I may just become a regular on Wednesdays.

Splash Thursdays

Oy, I’m starting to think that maybe I’m going out too much! Well, last night wasn’t expected, and I did stay later than I thought I would have, but at least I slept late and I’ll be okay for going to Splash tonight. This will be the second week I’m actually going with somebody. Yes, through all the craziness of my week, I forgot to mention that last week I met my buddy Laura Kim and her friend Michael at Splash. It was totally unplanned and totally a blast (except when the dancer who was dancing on the bar above me knocked my drink over three, count em’, three times!).


A cool Cam Wow double shot of the show at Splash last Thursday


Me and LK

Anyway, tonight I am going to Splash with my friend Paul, who actually asked me earlier in the week if I’d be going tonight. Since I went last week, I wouldn’t ordinarily be going, but I kind of turn him down a lot, so I said okay. We’ll see how it goes…I’ve spoken of Paul before, and we’ve had both good and bad times together there, but now I think things will be okay. I've come to like him more the more I get to know him and I think we have a good understanding of one another. He and I are definitely in a better place than before, for sure!

Uninspired Plans

I’ve got more tentative plans all the way through Monday, and none of them are etched in stone. A couple of them, with guys, are making me a little apprehensive. I tell ya, I just don’t know about guys anymore. I’m starting to feel like no one out there is really worth it. It seems every experience I have with a guy always ends up in a negative way…either I’m not really interested, or there’s that one thing that makes it seem like it’s not worth even trying, and then of course there are the ones who like me, but the feelings are not mutual. I'm getting a lot of those lately!

As I said, two of my tentative plans are with potential guys, and I hold no real excitement for either. Not the guys, necessarily, just the situations….I dunno, I’m starting to believe that I’ll just know the right one when he comes along and that I should never expect anything from any encounter with anybody. I guess in that way my experience with "him" taught me a couple of good, but hard lessons.

He was the first person since Joe that I knew…I don’t know how, but I just knew I wanted to “hang” with for awhile. It’s inexplicable really, but it wasn’t attraction or sex or what he did specifically or anything like that. I guess it was just the connection that we had at the time that made me not want to think about anyone else.

Then of course, there’s what happened in the end. When it ended the first time, I was completely shocked, and then after the second time… I guess the rejection was a little dose of reality that hardened me a little, and it’s going to be a long time before I trust in a relationship with anyone.

So these two experiences, I guess, have shown me their value in the lessons they’ve taught me. For now I feel as if I’m just going through motions with guys. I’m just playing it day by day and we’ll see where the weekend and the rest of the summer take me… In the meantime, I just know that when the right one does come along, if he does, again I'll just know it, but hopefully next time the feeling will be mutual, so I've got to be very aware.

Doctor, doctor

My good buddies are happy to know that after months, okay years, of bugging me, and months after I stated on this very blog that I would start taking care of things, health-wise, I finally made two appointments with doctors I’ve really needed to see for a long time. I had my first one yesterday, and now I have to go for a colonoscopy, ugh! Just what I was afraid of, but…my next appointment is on Tuesday and that one I’m kind of looking forward to. I will keep you posted.

So that’s my story for the past and the next few days, for the most part. Hopefully I’ll get back soon enough so that I won’t have so much to say and keep you reading so long, but I do appreciate the page views! Have a great evening!

Here's a photo I found on the Internet the other day that I thought was cool...


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Well it’s Sunday evening and another weekend has come and gone. Thankfully there are only a few weeks left of school and so it isn’t all bad. Of course, the weekend went by fast…it always does, and for me usually it’s filled with chores. Even though I try and do a lot during the week at night, there are always bigger jobs waiting for me on the weekend, sigh!

Da Bunk Fridays

On Friday night I went to the Bunkhouse for its weekly ‘Da Bunk’ Fridays and I ran into an old acquaintance of mine from years past, a girl named Laurie. Laurie was a girl who once worked with my friend Marcia and though she and I were never really friends, we see each other once in awhile and shoot the breeze. Apparently, Laurie isn’t doing too well these days. She didn’t say much except that she was single again and I can only imagine that it was recent from the way she was acting, all depressed and quiet. I wondered what she was even doing there.

Anyway, Laurie had a friend with her, a loudmouthed, wacky old lesbian who was very talkative. She wasn’t too friendly at first, but then as Laurie got quiet, she got more and more talkative with me, and she was telling me stuff I didn’t want to hear:

“Uh, ya know, I’m so horny tonight, but it’s too bad cuz I’m menstruating…”

“Ewwwww,” I thought to myself. I really didn't want to go there!

“….ya know, she needs ta have a good time (referring to Laurie)…get er mind off things, ya know?’

On and on she went. Thankfully the music was loud and it was hard to hear her. Still, she was literally backing me into a corner there for awhile, moving closer and closer to shout in my ear as I moved further and further back. I was so frustrated…all I wanted to do was cruise the dance floor and do my thing, but I just couldn’t lose her.



Thank goodness Laurie finally told her she wanted to go home and so they left me to my own devices. The rest of the night was pretty good, though, even though the ratio of women to men was greater than I would have liked. The deejay was definitely on with some great music and I danced it up later than I have in awhile at the old Bunk, but eventually Laurie’s friend caught my eye once again back by the bar. Apparently she hadn’t had her fill of the place and came back alone for more. I hightailed it outta there before she could see me!

Splash-Ritz Saturdays

I think I’m starting to form a new habit on Saturday nights. I start out at Splash and then work my way back to the Ritz afterwards. I did it that night with Ivan, and I did it again last week. I ‘m so thankful he introduced me to it because it’s a great place to dance and even though I didn’t plan on going there last night, the music at Splash absolutely sucked and so…

The Ritz is very unlike Splash. The people are unpretentious and the venue is very intimate. The crowd is good looking and friendly and the deejay has absolutely rocked every time I’ve gone there. His setup is right near the dance floor, so he’s right there rocking with the rest of the crowd to the music. Maybe one of these nights I’ll have to just skip Splash altogether and go there!

So that’s my weekend, in a nutshell. Not your typical weekend for a 46 year old, huh? What can I say, I love to go out and I love to dance! Just like Kylie says, “Now we know life is hard, so we’re living for the weekend.” Just five more days….Peace!

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Happy Hump Day everyone! Today has been a perfect one for me, as I am finally well rested, basking in the afterglow of a memorable concert, and getting lots of writing done in the process. After being so heavily occupied the past few days, it’s nice to be able to have time to sit down and be productive. The weather’s been crappy all day, and my allergies are acting up, so I don’t mind staying inside anyway…

Kylie

Well, last night was the Kylie Minogue concert at the Hammerstein Ballroom in NYC and it was incredible! I went with Ivan, who treated me to front row seats in the mezzanine. Though I hadn’t written about it before, the last (and first!) time I saw her was in the same venue and my friend and I had floor ‘seats’ to, which really meant that we had to stand. Therefore it was difficult to get a good view of the show, although it was a good time anyway.

This time, however, I had an unobstructed view of the entire show. They were probably the best seats I ever had for any concert and so the show was highly enjoyable. What made it more enjoyable was the company. I’ve told you before that Ivan is a huge Kylie fan, by far the biggest I know personally. He is somewhat young and has not been to many concerts before last night, and he’s never seen his “muse” live and in person.

Ivan prepared for the event choosing carefully the clothes he would wear and since we had front row seats, he had a special poster made for the occasion in the hopes the star might just see it. As the show started, his eyes filled with wonder and enthusiasm as he watched his diva do her thing on the stage. It was just as much fun to watch him enjoy the show as anything else. Unfortunately the one time he tried to hold up his poster, he was told by security staff not to do so. Other than that, though, I know he had an awesome time, as did I.

I put up a review of the show this morning on Y!CN. Check it out:

Kylie Minogue at New York’s Hammerstein Ballroom

I’m thinking of doing another piece on Examiner under my “Gay Issues” title, as it was a very gay show! Stay tuned for that, and in the meantime, here are some photos I took with my iPhone. They didn’t come out as nice as I would have liked, but some of them are decent:


'Aphrodite' the opening of the show!

Work it!

Cupid Boys!

Mmmmm...gladiators!


Kylie and her crew

Looking for an Angel

Finale

A genuine and inspiring young manIvan

I’d like to take a little time here to talk about Ivan. I first met him a couple of Saturdays ago at my favorite hangout, Splash, and he and I hit it off, so to speak, right away. We’ve gotten together a couple of times since and had fun together. He’s a genuine and inspiring young man who aspires to great things eventually. In a lot of ways he reminds me of me in that way.

Though I vaguely mentioned it earlier, I never said specifically that it was he who I inspired to start writing in his own blog, which he calls “Bruises Fade.” I am linking it here because he’s shared it on Facebook and I think he’s definitely got a good start to what promises to be the very enlightening story of his young life. So please check it out if you’d like to get to know this young man as he lives and grows.

The proverbial shoe on the other foot

Anyway, today is kind of sad when it comes to Ivan. Ever since we went out on last Saturday night (see Weekend Ups n Downs), I’ve been feeling that maybe I’ve led him into thinking that things might go along faster than I really would like them to. I’ve always had a difficult time not responding to kindness and affection with the same, and unintentionally I may have given him the wrong impression. The truth is, I’m still hurting right now and as I said in the not too distant past I don’t think I could be in another relationship with someone for awhile. I had this on my mind all last night and I couldn’t let it end without telling him so. In the process I’m afraid I’ve hurt his feelings, maybe even just a bit.

Since I know how it feels to be on the receiving end of such news, I can understand what he must be feeling and I wish it weren’t so. The very last thing I would ever want to do would be to hurt someone, and I only hope that we’ve known each other too short a time for him to hurt too much. Truth be told, I like Ivan a lot. He’s kind and innocent, hard working and bright eyed, very sweet, and I hope that he continues to be in my life from here on out, especially since he’s a Kylie fan, too, lol!

So in honor of last night’s show and as a big thank you to Ivan for taking me, here’s a clip of the Aussie diva covering the Eurythmics’ classic ‘There Must Be an Angel (Playing with My Heart),’ live from the Hammerstein Ballroom. Check it out:


Pick up Aphrodite here:



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Well it’s Sunday evening and we’re on the cusp of another work week. At least the weeks are growing short and summer will soon be upon us. I’ve put in for a couple of summer teaching spots, but the way things are looking I’m not counting on it. I’ve made contingency plans to not work at all and enjoy the whole season for a change, so we’ll see what happens. Maybe I can really start doing some serious writing then!

The Weekend

I’m feeling very blah this evening…all day as a matter of fact. It’s because I didn’t sleep very much last night, or this morning I should say. After yesterday’s disappointing discovery and ensuing bit of anger, I soon realized that this was probably going to be a good thing and went about getting ready for my evening out.

Yesterday I mentioned my new friend, Ivan, whom I was going to meet last night at Splash. It turns out he doesn’t usually go there on Saturday nights, but prefers to go to another club in Brooklyn, one which I believe ‘he’ now frequents since our breakup. Ivan came to Splash especially for me and the night turned out to be a blast. We danced and stuff for a couple of hours, but eventually he was getting tired of the place. He at first suggested that bar in Brooklyn, but I didn’t want to chance it, especially yesterday. So we headed uptown towards Hell’s Kitchen, the newest gay hot spot in the city, and a new bar for me called the Ritz. I loved it!

The Ritz is a tiny place, with a cozy bar area out front and a crowded dance bar in the back. The crowd seemed a little more local than what you see at Splash, and the music was definitely more rocking. We made our way through the very crowded dance floor towards the very back, where we danced together on the stage. We jammed to Britney, Gaga and Madonna, and the deejay threw in a couple of great mash-ups. There was no Kylie, much to Ivan’s disappointment, especially since he put in a request.



He and I danced til the wee hours of the morning, having a great time. The Ritz was a lot of fun, different than Splash, and I think I’ll definitely be back there. Afterwards, we took a slow ride back to his place, making a pit stop for a snack and some coffee. We got to talk and know each other’s stories a little better. I really enjoyed it, but I just know that for me I have to take things slowly, which isn’t hard of course because we live so far apart and have different work schedules. We’ll just have to see where things take us…

So I got home shortly after 6AM. The sun was already coming up, giving me a quick notion to go down by the water and take what I’m sure would have been spectacular pictures. I didn’t have my camera, of course, and the iPhone 3 doesn’t take good photos, so I just went home. Alas, the reason for the blah, tiring day.

I started a little spring cleaning and did some shopping. The weather was gorgeous, but unfortunately my energy level wasn’t enough to get me outside in the yard. There’s always the afternoons and next weekend!

I’ll leave you here with a Kylie song. Ivan and I are going to see her on Tuesday and I’m really excited about it, though not as excited as him. (He’s by far the biggest Kylie fan I know!) So this one’s dedicated to Ivan…one of my favorites…enjoy “Fever”:





By the way, a very Happy Birthday to my good friend Fran!



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Today is Friday and I’m in a writing groove! This is the fourth piece I’ve penned today and I need to take a break once I’m done with it or else I’ll find myself still in my p.j.’s, sitting at my pc at 9PM tonight. It’s not often that I get into such a creative mood, full of ideas, and I have to go with it when it happens. So here goes…

My Thursday

Yesterday was not a good day for me. My entry described all of the things that were going on around me and I was very frustrated with all of it, though as I said in my post, I wasn’t going to let any of it get to me and I didn’t. Once I had finished writing it, I hopped in the shower and got ready for my date.

Now I don’t want to share his name, and I warned him last night that any interaction with me could get him mentioned here, so I can’t not discuss it. I have to admit, I was a little apprehensive about the date for several reasons, all having to do with the ex. As I noted in a previous post, the new guy is the same age as him and they’re both Hispanic, so he immediately reminded me of my ex when I met him. I’m also still smarting over him and I have a lot of trepidation about setting off in the direction of another relationship right now, but he is nice and he’s cute and I’ve decided not to worry about it…just keep moving forward!



In the end, I was so happy that I went. We ate at one of my favorite Brazilian restaurants, Greenfield’s, which used to be here on Long Island, but closed awhile ago. The conversation was comfortable and nice, and once again I was reminded of my ex because there were eerie similarities to both of our stories. I hadn’t realized beforehand that his breakup was even more recent than mine, which is probably a good thing because it puts us both in similar places. Anyway, he’s been through a lot of things in his short life and this morning I was pleased to find out that our conversation inspired him to write in his own blog for the first time.

Now I’m not going to share it here. I would never do that without asking first, but I read it this morning and found it to be a very well done introduction to his purpose. He called his post “Pieces to a Puzzle” and in it he referred to his future blog entries as puzzle pieces that will eventually make up the whole of his life and who he is. I feel the same exact way with my own writings, whether on here or at Y!CN. All of the pieces together make up a complete picture of who I am as a person, and his entry inspired me to post my “J is for John” piece.

So I move forward in time with an open mind, not expecting anything, and just enjoying the moments we’ll share. Whether I get a new friend or anything else out of it, I’ll be better off in the end for I know that knowing him will enrich my life somehow. We’ll see…

Monetizing the blog

As many of you may have noticed, I’ve been placing advertisements within the blog in the hopes of generating some income from it. Since it’s taken off in recent months (I’m occasionally outnumbering my hits on Y!CN with this blog…wow!), I’ve been focusing more on it at the expense of my page views at Y!CN and other endeavors. The income from the other sites has dropped with less articles posted and so I need to find something to make up for it.

Though I will try my best not to have too many ads on here, especially pop-ups (I hate those!), I will continue to place ads on where to find the songs I post within these pages. I’ve placed links to both digital downloads (iTunes) and traditional CD’s (Amazon) below videos so that any of you who enjoy the music posted here can easily find a place to get it. I hope that helps and going forward I’ll be looking to add some more useful advertisements that relate to the content of the site.

Splash Thursday

After my date last night, I returned to Splash for some much needed dancing therapy. With all that happened yesterday and thoughts of my ex nagging at me, I needed to let loose a little on the dance floor. I was once again amazed at how much better the place is on weeknights than on weekends. The music is much better overall and last night was just about as crowded as I’d ever seen it.



I danced so much last night that I was forced to leave early because my shirt was literally soaked from sweat. That was okay, though; because by the time I left I’d had enough ‘dancing therapy’ and was feeling better. In the meantime, here’s a great dance song they played last night from back in the day:





Y!CN Articles

Here are some pieces I’ve published since the last time I added links here:

Keys to Life #7 – Stop Blaming Everyone Else

The latest in the series and a good one, I think. Three more to go and then the real fun begins…

Remembering the 1994 New York Rangers: My Most Treasured Sports Memento

This one was an assignment I claimed from Y!CN. Though I don’t follow sports like I used to, I still enjoy a game here and there. My favorite sport is hockey. I think it’s the most exciting, non-stop action in any sport and the Rangers are my absolute favorite team! 1994 was an awesome year for NY sports and I’ve got a really special memento to prove it!

Pop Music News Weekly, April 12th

I missed out on my weekly post this week, but here’s last week’s edition with some exciting stuff.

My Long Island

This one’s the latest in my “Crossroads” series. I hadn’t written on that in awhile and since summer is approaching fast and I’ve resigned myself to staying here on Long Island for it, I decided to share some of my favorite things about the place I currently live.

Rihanna’s Top Ten Songs…So Far!

I love Rihanna, and top ten lists are always fun to write and they get lots of hits.
Well, as Porky Pig used to say, “That’s all folks.” Have a great weekend!

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Happy Hump Day everybody! I say that with trepidation because since I’m on vacation I don’t consider this a real hump to want to get over. So far I’ve been enjoying my time and I don’t want it to end. I’ve been wanting to get back to a regular posting ever since I’ve been doing the A-Z Challenge and so today’s a good day to get going.



420

Today is April 20th, a date that’s already being noted all over the Internet. For those of you who aren’t in the know, the number ‘420’ is a code word for marijuana. Now I don’t want to say too much about it here, but I am one who believes that marijuana should be legalized. Considering the widespread use and even celebration of alcohol, I don’t think that pot is any worse. It’s all a matter of perception.

I remember about two years ago when Olympic gold medal swimmer Michael Phelps was busted for having pot. I wrote a piece on it, which you can read below. The article contains all I have to say on the subject and rather than rehash it here, I’ll just place the link for you to read if you like:

Michael Phelps and Pot

Splash Tuesday

As I had planned, last night I went to Splash. As many of you know, I love to dance and any chance I get to go dancing, I go for it. Tuesday nights are always a packed house and I like the music they play much better than on the weekends, so I went and had a fantastic time, except for one little thing…

Big oops…Caught in a lie!

Back on April 2nd, I wrote a post called the ‘NOW Generation.’ In it, I spoke of a friend whom I had recently reconnected with. We’d hung out a lot last summer and we lost contact when I was dating you know who. Not long after my breakup, he gave me a call and we saw each other a few times. He and I never really connected on a relationship level, but we enjoyed each other’s company every once in awhile. I have to admit, I have a soft spot for him.

Anyway, in that post I mentioned how he abandoned me at Splash one night and made me really angry. I left the bar without him, but ended up going back to drive him home. Ever since that night I’ve avoided him like the plague. He had texted me the day after, asking me if I was angry with him and I told him that I was, but I wouldn’t be forever. That boy is persistent.

In the past week, he’s texted me quite a few times, trying to get together. The last time was yesterday, and in his text he asked me if I was going to Splash. He must’ve remembered that I said I was going to go during the week of spring break and he wanted to tag along. I tried putting him off as long as I could, but eventually I had to answer him. I told him that I was going to see someone I had met the other night in the city (see below) and I wasn’t sure where we were going. He asked if we were going to go to Splash. (He really wanted to go!) I told him I didn’t think so, but I would call him if we were. That was a total lie, something which I rarely do, and as karma goes, I got caught.

The first thing I do when I get to the bar is check my coat. The bar was already buzzing with a crowd when I got there and there was a line at the coat check. There I am, waiting to check my coat, and who walks past me but him. Somehow, to my surprise, he managed to get there via the LIRR with a friend. He was impossible to avoid as we met face to face. He kissed me hello and went on his merry way. I was a little stunned and I felt guilty for having gotten caught in a lie and things were awkward at first as I proceeded to avoid him like the plague.

As the night wore on, we bumped into each other a few times and at one point he asked me once again if I was angry with him, and I told him I wasn’t, which was true. I knew from that question that he knew why I had lied and all of a sudden things seemed okay between us. We each did our own thing the rest of the night, occasionally sharing a bump and grind on the dance floor. It was actually kind of fun.

I took on the role of protector, as he had gotten pretty smashed and there were some guys trying to take advantage of that. I had to step in a few times, letting the guys know that he had someone looking out for him. Around 3AM, he told me that the friend he had come with got kicked out, and so I offered him a ride home, which he took.

It was actually nice having someone to talk to on the way home. My friend is really a good guy…he’s just a little misguided and sometimes it comes out. I think that maybe we’ve entered a whole new realm in our relationship and it’ll be interesting to see how things turn out.



And speaking of guys…

Last Saturday I met a new guy at Splash. It was another late night as he and I danced our butts off til the wee hours of the morning. Afterwards I drove him home to Queens and we had our first chance to speak a little more in depth once we were in the car. As it turns out, he’s a huge Kylie fan, and he’s going to the same show as I am in May, so that gives me a new reason to look forward to the show.

As it turns out, he’s the same age as my ex and he’s also Hispanic, from Mexico. He’s a real cutie, but I’m afraid that meeting him has served to bring the other one back into my mind. It’s funny that getting over him is taking longer than the relationship itself, but I just have to persevere.

I spoke to the new guy yesterday and we’re going to get together tomorrow, his day off. I’m not sure what we’re going to do yet, but I’m looking forward to it. Stay tuned…



Odds n’ Ends

Well, today is the most beautiful day of the week and here I am at 1PM sitting in my office and typing away. I’m having a couple of friends over for dinner at 5, so I really need to get my ass in gear. I’m also a little excited because tonight one of my friends and I are going to try and get tickets to see Lady Gaga on Saturday at the Nassau Coliseum. I’m crossing my fingers and hoping we get them, but I won’t really get excited until I know we have them in hand. In the meantime, take a look at her ‘Born This Way’ from the Grammy Awards:




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Its 6:30 Saturday evening and it’s the end of a beautiful day. I’d like to think that my dad gave us this wonderful sunshine in honor of his birthday and it couldn’t have been nicer except if it was a little warmer. Anyway, on with today’s post…

There’s a theme to today’s piece, and its one I’ve been thinking about for awhile. I may try and tackle it one day on Examiner, but for now I’ll take it from my own first-person point of view. At the risk of dating myself, I’ve come to be really disappointed in today’s youth, especially the gay ones. The Black Eyed Peas had a song on their “The E.N.D.” album called “NOW Generation.” Though there wasn’t a video for the song, I will post the audio for it below. The song talks about the narcissism and impatience of today’s generation of youngsters and I think it speaks volumes about them and the future.

Being my age in the gay community is an aberration, and abnormality. The young ones would just as soon not have us around. Just like in the entertainment business, someone my age is considered old and left for the proverbial pasture. Well I don’t feel old. In fact I feel better now than I ever did before and I think I look a lot younger than I am, yet even I feel the effects of the loathing that today’s youth generally has for us folks and I don’t like it.


"I'm not cocky...I just love myself!" - C. Aguilera

I am speaking from experience here and I will back it up with a couple of stories below. You see, I’ve never pursued a young person anywhere, but the ones I’ve had contact with have all pursued me. At this point in time I’ve had enough bad experiences that I’m starting to feel disdain for them in the same way they do us. All I can say is that karma is a bitch and Father Time yields to no one. Those who choose to act like assholes towards older people or anyone else for that matter will get it back someday. I only wish I was going to be around to see it!

Splash Friday

Last night did not turn out well. My friend and I met up as planned and had a decent time for awhile. Around 2AM, the two of us had gone downstairs to check out the music and we were dancing. Some guy who was dancing nearby came up and started dancing with me as I had my back to my friend. In a flash, he made a beeline away from us and around the bar. When I saw this I immediately went after him, but lost him in the crowd. WTF? I looked upstairs and there he was, dancing on the dance floor by himself, oblivious to the fact that I was even there.

It was typical, strange behavior that I’d experienced before with him. As I mentioned the other day, he’s young and very young-minded, narcissistic and rude. All he had to have done was say that he was going to check out the scene upstairs and I would’ve been fine with that, but he chose to be rude about it. And to make matters worse, he didn’t even realize he was being rude.

I was pissed and went straight to the coat room and left. I texted him from the car, telling him that I had left, but before calling him a few choice words. In about five minutes the texts started flying. You see, I was his ride home and of course, being the (dumb-idiotic-jerky) nice guy that I am, I ended up going back to the bar to get him. It was a good thing he texted me when he did because I was almost at the Midtown tunnel and beyond going back.

The ride home was awkward and I think he actually made a date towards the end of the ride, for he was texting back and forth with someone and it was 3:30AM. I dropped him off and figured it was the last I’d hear from him…at least that’s what I wanted, but he texted me this morning apologizing for what happened. I think he’d like to go to Splash again with me, but believe me, it won’t be for awhile!

Vanity is an appropriate name

Last week I mentioned a Facebook friend of mine named Craig Vanity. He’s a deejay who makes a lot of great mash-ups of dance songs. I put a link to his website and mentioned doing a future piece on him, but I think that’s all done with now. Well, he turned out to be another ass of today’s generation.

After posting about him on the blog, I sent him an email telling him about the mention and asking him if he’d answer some questions for a piece. I never received a response, but he posted something on his wall that I think referred to me. It went:

“really ppl aka creeps, stop messaging me in my inbox askin for my number and dick pix, thank you and gnite”

It’s obvious that if it was intended for me, the man doesn’t read, nor can he write. He probably just saw my face and age and came up with a conclusion, a wrong conclusion…and all because he doesn’t bother to read. In looking over his wall, I can see he’s typical of young people today: he uses a lot of profanity, talks about random inane things, and he doesn’t work. Well, of course I don’t know everything about the guy, but he gave up an opportunity to possibly be seen and heard by people who might never have ever heard of him otherwise, and for that I think he’s a jackass! Remember karma!

Of course there’s much more to the story. These are but two individuals that i have come in contact with who only see the world as being centered around their young selves. Of course, every generation has had that certain cockiness and self-serving minds, but this time it’s different. In this day of instant electronic messaging from a wide ranging set of mediums, they are an impatient, me-first generation, unlike their predessessors. They are the NOW Generation.

*Of course, this post generalizes a great deal. I have to acknowledge that there are a great number of people in today's generation who do not exhibit the qualities of narcissism and rudeness I've described above. The opinions expressed are based on personal experiences with a couple of young gay men, among many others I come across in daily life and are not meant to paint everyone with this broad brush. The folks that do exhibit these behaviors, though, do deserve to be exposed.



NOW Generation

We are the now generation
We are the generation now
This is the now generation
This is the generation now

I want money
I want it want it want it
Fast internet
Stay connected in a jet
Wi-fi, podcast
Blasting out an SMS
Text me and I text you back
Check me on the iChat
I'm all about that h t t p
You're a PC I'm a Mac
I want it..

Myspace in your space
Facebook is a new place
Dip divin' socializin'
I'll be out in cyber space
Google is my professor
Wikipedia checker
Checkin my account
Loggin in and loggin out
Baby I want it..
Now!

This is the now generation
This is the generation now
We are the now generation
I want I want I want it now
I want the cold hard cash
I want I want I want it now

And I just can't wait
I need it immediately
And I just can't wait
I want it immediately
Cause time can't wait and
I sure can't wait
I ain't got no patience
I sure can't wait

We are the now generation
We are the generation now
This is the now generation
This is the generation now
I want money
I want cold hard cash
I'll take your dollar and your euro
And you'll have a blast
So take your day and your credit
And stick it up your ass
And do it now!

I want it now!
Big money, give me mo' money
(Yeah I want it now!)
I need cas.. oh I need it bad
(I want it now!)
Quick in a hurry
Like your name is Flash
(I want it now!)
You make me wait?
And Im'a whip your ass
(I want it now!)
I want it now baby!
(Now!)
I want it
(Now!)
I want it
(Now!)
Now!

Fast, rapido
Really quick like torpedo
Need for speed is my credo
You need to feed this negrito
Sender, buyer, brother boat
Rapid like a thunder bolt
Activated rock the boat
Just ask Barack who broight the hope to
Now!

It was a now generation
And I just can't wait
I need it immediately
And I Just can't wait
I want it immediately
Cause if time can't wait then
I sure can't wait
I ain't got no patience
No I just can't wait
Not again
Expedite
No time for procrastination
Expedite
Improve my sensation

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Happy Sunday…it’s now Daylight Savings Time and I think we’re all going to be a little off because of it for the next few days. It’s okay, though, because now the days will be longer giving us the feeling like we’re that much closer to the warmer months. Yay! Now where to start???

Music in the Car, Finally

After almost five months of having to listen to my iPod through headphones while in my car, I’ve finally freed myself of that inconvenience. Yesterday I had my new car stereo installed, with an auxiliary plug which my older one didn’t have. What a nice feeling to be free of the wires!

Splash


Katy Perry wows em at Splash

Sometimes I’m not sure what draws me to Splash every week. I’ve always liked to go clubbing and in recent years the Long Island club scene has been abysmal at best. With the exception of the summer months, there’s really no good place to go out here (I can’t wait to go back to the Grove again!). I don’t like staying home alone, and my friends are beyond their clubbing years, so I go it alone.

I’ve been going to Splash regularly since the end of last summer. After spending Saturday nights on Fire Island all summer, I just couldn’t bring myself to return to the Bunkhouse again. Splash is one of the most well-known clubs in the city and I’d been there before, so once Fire Island had closed for the season it was weekends at Splash for me. Going there is slowly becoming old hat and I’m definitely yearning for something different.

Ever since that night in October when I met him, going to Splash has been bittersweet for me. It’s the place where I met him so his spirit definitely haunts me when I’m there. Going to Splash on the weekend kind of sucks, too! I guess they know there’s always going to be a crowd, so the music is way too clubbish for my taste. Club music is okay sometimes, but often the highs that get you going slow down to awkward moments of everyone kinda standing around not knowing what to do with themselves. I hate that!

I’ve found during my vacation weeks that Tuesdays and Thursdays are the best nights for music there. Both are themed nights, “Twink Tuesdays” and “Campus Thursdays,” so obviously they both attract a younger crowd than on the weekends. Us ‘older’ folks (I’m not old, nah!) work for a living and we have to reserve our fun for the weekends, but when I’ve had the opportunity to go on either of these nights, I’ve always had great fun.


Ad for Twink Tuesdays at Splash

Weekend nights at Splash are definitely a crapshoot. I’ve had both good and bad experiences on Fridays and Saturdays, and I can say with certainty that the music is usually what makes it good or bad for me. On Saturday nights, downstairs is always the place for the good stuff, musically. The only problem there is that there’s not too much space for dancing, especially when it gets too crowded, which it often does. I once had an argument with the deejay because he said I was knocking into his setup, which I wasn’t. They’ve since moved him to another area to make room for more dancers.


F-Word Fridays at Splash

Last Night

Last night was a strange night, but overall it was good. Since we changed the clocks, the night would be an hour shorter than normal, something that I always hated as a club goer. When I got there I followed my normal routine, going downstairs to my favorite bartender for a starter and then heading back upstairs to dance. When I got upstairs, though, the music absolutely sucked! I waded around the crowd for more than a half an hour waiting for something I could dance to. It was no use. I headed back downstairs to hang for awhile.

I returned to the main floor about an hour later and the deejay finally started playing something I could dance to. It was today’s “Song of the Day”, Ne-Yo’s “Closer” and I quickly jumped into the fray on the dance floor. As is always the case with me, this is how I meet people.

As I was getting my groove on, there was a guy and a girl dancing right next to me. He was tall, blond and cute, and she was a short, chubby Latina with big, big hair. It was her whom I made contact with first (flying hair notwithstanding!) . As the song got to the chorus, we sang at the top of our lungs to each other and proceeded to get down to the music. That’s when he jumped in.

His name was Eric and he definitely liked me, though according to Lisa (the Latina), he was straight. Though I thought they were friends, it turns out they had just met that night after seeing some sort of show and she suggested they come to Splash for a drink as she suspected he might play for our team. I think she was secretly hoping that he wasn’t, as I could sense her disappointment at his attention towards me.

Once a couple of songs had finished, we moved over to the bar where they each got themselves a drink and we were able to chat. Eric was definitely gay and definitely drunk! He was whispering sweet nothings into my ear, but I didn’t want to leave Lisa out and so I turned to include her in the conversation. That’s when Eric made his way towards one of the dancers dancing on a platform nearby, giving both of us a chuckle at his drunken ogling.

We spoke for a bit and then I decided to go back downstairs for a drink. (I only go to one bartender, who I’ll tell you about another time!) I excused myself and left Lisa to go grab Eric again. The music downstairs was hot as always…they were playing Chris Brown’s “Yeah 3X” and I moseyed on over to dance. While I was dancing, Lisa and Eric walked by…I think they were looking for me, but I can’t be sure. I tried getting their attention as they walked by. Lisa didn’t catch me, but Eric turned around and gave me a big smile and a high five. He was way too drunk! It was the last I’d see of the two of them.

Overall, it was a good night. Although sometimes I hate going to clubs alone, it’s really the only way I ever get the chance to meet new people, which is sometimes fun, and always entertaining.

For the first time in a long time, I drove home without a thought of him. Though he’s still in there, I think he’s thankfully starting to fade into memory. I’m starting to realize that I never really had a chance with him and maybe its better that it ended so soon. It sucks that he grabbed a piece of my heart in the process, but that’s just life, isn’t it? I just wish summer would come soon so that I can take a break from going there so much. Stay tuned …

Finally, here's one of my favorite club songs. It's called "Let Me Think About It" by Ida Corr and it's awesome! Enjoy!

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I absolutley love today's "Song of the Day"! "Closer" is the kind of song that is so sing-able and so danceable, with slow verses and a high, irresistable chorus. I was at Splash last night and the music totally sucked for the longest time...until they played this. The song woke up the dancer in me and that was it for the night. Love it!

"...and I just can't pull myself away
under her spell I can't break
I just can't stop
I just can't stop
I just can't stop!"

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Today is Monday, the first official day off from work for the week. After a not so great day yesterday, I feel refreshed and ready to go today. I just finished and submitted a piece on foreign language songs that I think is pretty good. The song “No Speak Americano” inspired me to write it and I surprisingly found enough songs out there to make up a whole article. Stay tuned…

Happy Birthday to You

Where to begin??? The same question I asked yesterday, only this time I’m ready to answer. I got invited to my friend Vera’s house for birthday cake for her son Frankie on Saturday night. In my own dizziness, I set out to buy a card for him Saturday afternoon, but for some reason I had Vera on my mind. Her birthday was a week before his and I’d already bought her a card. So what did I do? Instead of buying a card for Frankie, I bought another one for Vera. Duh! At least one of them was generic enough to give to the little guy.



As sometimes happens with Vera, the plans got a little changed and I ended up going to her mom’s house instead. Now I’ve known Vera since I was in my early twenties and we’ve been through a lot together. I’ve spent a lot of time with her family back in the day and I feel as comfortable with them as I do with my own family, so I really didn’t mind swinging by there. Vera’s family reminds me a lot of my own. I don’t know if it’s an Italian American or a Bronx thing, but both of our families are a little on the wacky side.


Me and Vera's family

Without saying anything that might get me into trouble, it was a good time. I think I finally made some inroads with Frankie, who actually sat on my lap for the first time and even gave me a hug and a kiss goodbye. Happy birthday Frankie!



Splash, Redux

After the birthday cake, I headed out once again for the city. As before, it’s those days when I have no work that I’m left to nothing but the thoughts in my own head and I need to get out for some dance therapy. Since I’m on vacation, I plan on going out whenever I can, and since there’s no longer any places to go during the week here on Long Island, it’s Splash to the rescue.

Once again, I had a great time. For the second night in a row, the music was awesome and I danced my ass off, so much so that I had to take off my shirt (which I don’t normally like to do!) because it was soaking wet from the sweat. The dancing did its thing and kept my mind occupied throughout the very late night. I only wish I could have that all the time!

On a side note, I want to add that sometimes I just hate people from Long Island. Every once in awhile I will see people from the bars out here at Splash, and I did on Saturday. As is often the case, these idiots don’t seem to know who I am outside of their normal realm of the Bunk House and Fire Island. Two guys that I’ve seen and known for years walked right up beside me and pretended as if they didn’t know me. WTF?



Anyway, that’s all I have for now. It snowed overnight and so it’s a little easier for me to be cooped up inside and getting to work. Here’s a video for one of my favorite foreign language songs. It’s called “Dragonsta din Tei” and it’s sung in Romanian by a boy band called O-Zone. I have no idea what they’re singing about, but I think the song is great fun. Take a listen:

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Happy Saturday everyone! Today is the first day of a much needed 9-day vacation. As many of you know, the last vacation I had was probably among my all time worst, so I really want to make up for it this time and I got off to a great start yesterday. Here’s the latest on my so called life:

Dating…Um, I Dunno…



You know how similar things all seem to happen in bunches? Like when there’s a plane crash or something…there could have been none in years and then all of a sudden there are two or three in the span of a couple of weeks. Well, that happened to me yesterday. I’ve been single now for the better part of three years and no one has ever tried to set me up before…that is until now, and the potential blind dates were almost plural.

I don’t know, maybe it’s because of my recent breakup that people are thinking I need to meet somebody new to get over it, but that’s really not the case. It all started several weeks ago when a coworker mentioned setting me up on a date with a Spanish teacher from a neighboring school district (see Daily Ramblings, January 22nd). At the time I just listened to her and smiled, not really giving much thought to the matter. I hadn’t really come up again until Thursday, when she showed me his picture in the newspaper (it was a local newspaper about his school’s trip to Argentina). Then it came up again when I got to work yesterday:

“Oh John, there you are. I’ve been looking for you all morning. I finally spoke to him last night. I told him all about you. We’re going to be Facebook friends and so he can look at your page and you can see his…”

“Oh…” was all I could say.

“He asked a lot of questions, and don’t worry, I played you all up. I told him all about your writing and your awards. Oh, he was so cute. You’re so cute. I think you guys would be so perfect together. I’m so excited.”

She could have gone on and on, but thankfully we both had to be at a meeting, so we were cut short. She tentatively mentioned that he and I would meet for coffee when he gets back from his trip. At least I’ve got some time to think more about it!

Then yesterday afternoon I spent time with another friend, Laura Kim. In recent months, she’s expanded her “gay” horizons by befriending her makeup artist and his partner. I think his name is Michael. Anyway, for months she’d been spending a lot of time with Michael and his boyfriend and just recently, around Christmastime, the two of them broke up (you see what I’m saying, I know of at least three other couples that ended relationships around the same time!).

She really hadn’t mentioned Michael too much to me until yesterday. She went to Florida last night for her vacation and Michael is going to be taking care of her birds (she’s got four of them!) while she’s gone. He had been over her house the night before. She told me that he asked her if she would set him up with me. Obviously she’s told him a lot about me since she and I are such good friends. She told me this after I had told her about the other potential blind date.

“You see, I would never do that,” she said. “Michael asked me to introduce you guys, but I know both of you and I know that you wouldn’t work. You’re not each other’s type.”

She went on to tell me that Michael, being a makeup artist, is very flamboyant. She knows me well enough to know that’s not my type at all. “She makes Joe look like a truck driver!” she quipped. (Joe was not flamboyant at all, but it wasn’t ever that hard to figure out he was gay, if you know what I mean.)



I appreciated that. In fact, I had been wondering since she first told me of Michael’s breakup if she was going to suggest just that. Now I knew why she hadn’t, thankfully. At least that’s one of two I don’t have to worry about.

The truth of the matter is I’m still smarting and I really have no interest in men at all. I wish it were different, but at the moment that’s how I feel. Even though I haven’t seen or heard from him in awhile, I still think about him a lot and I’m still missing him. I can’t help but harbor a lot of those ‘what if’s’ in my head, wishing that I could go back and right all of the wrongs that I did to make him disappear from my life. I know they say time heals all wounds and eventually it will get better, but right now I guess I’m just going to have to keep feeling this way until that day comes.

I guess love comes around when you least expect it to, and true feelings cannot be wiped away just because your mind wants them to. I told my friend Laura Kim yesterday that I wish I’d just never met him. That way I wouldn’t have had to go through all of this hurt over these past several months and I’d just be my normal self like I had been before. She responded by reminding me how happy I was when I was with him. I don’t know…is it really better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all? I was very happy then, but that’s why I’m so unhappy now, so I can’t answer that question with any real honesty.



I’m dealing with things in the best way I know how. Sometimes I’m feeling really good about myself and other days he just lingers in my mind. It’s not as bad as it had been the first go around, just different. I’d like to think he’s smarting from missing me, too, but I just don’t know, nor will I ever probably. I’m guessing it’s been a lot easier for him to stay away from me, considering how angry he was the last time I heard from him. If only he truly saw things from my perspective, maybe he would’ve understood and not been so angry. In the meantime I just need to go about my business and get my mind right.

Splish Splash on a Friday Night

Even though I said I wouldn’t go to Splash anymore on Friday nights, I went last night. After all, it was the beginning of vacation and it does me good to get out and let loose for awhile. I’m really glad I did because I had a great time. For the first time since I’ve been going there I didn’t just wear a t-shirt and jeans. I got a little dressed up, with a beautiful black, button down shirt and some nice jeans. I looked good if I say so myself!

The music was awesome, and I danced all night with a lot of people. Several guys approached me throughout the night and that’s probably one of the reasons I like going out: because it feeds my self-esteem. Though I never try to pursue anything with anyone, it’s still nice to be playful and it’s fun to dance.

Sometimes I wish my friends would come with me…I hate going it alone all the time, and it would be nice not to have to deal with some of the creepers who approach me either! Maybe one day…

On a musical aside, the deejay played an awesome mix of three songs, one which I’d never heard before, but it worked perfectly. The songs included in the mix were Whitney Houston’s “I Wanna Dance with Somebody” (check out the video below!), LaRoux’s “Bulletproof” and Robyn’s “Indestructible.” Now there have been plenty of times when I’ve heard two songs mixed together, but rarely have I heard three, and it was so hot! Last night was also the first time I heard “Born this Way” in a club, and they followed it up with Madonna’s “Express Yourself.” Believe it or not, the dance floor was fuller for Madonna! You go Mo! Still the Queen!



Recent Yahoo Contributor Network Articles

Here are links to some recent pieces I’ve published on YCN:

Concert Tours Hitting the US in Spring/Summer 2011

There are lots of concert tours coming this way this summer, and there’s plenty I want to see. I actually think I’ll be going to see Lady GaGa in April at Nassau Coliseum and I’m definitely going to see Kylie in May. Rihanna and Sade are also on my wish list. I’d better get to writing so I’ll be able to afford the tickets!

Collected Works: The Misadventures of Johnny Driver, Season 2

I finally put all of the Johnny Driver Season 2 installments all in one place. Though I was sporadic in publishing the season’s episodes and readership has been down, I think my writing got a lot better this go around and the storylines were more involved. Check em out, please!

Great Advice for Online Writers from a fellow YCN Contributor

It’s been a slow week for writing as these two have been it for me. There’s another piece that I came across by fellow writer Lyn Lomasi that I want to share. It’s another one of her many great pieces of advice for online writers and I think it’s one of her best. Check it out:

10 Things Every Web Writer Should Know

A Short Spring Preview

The last two days were spectacular, weather-wise. Well, the temperature was anyway. The temps reached all the way into the 50’s and it was nice to be able to roll the windows down and not wear a jacket after the bitter winter we’ve had so far. But, never fear, Mother Nature is reminding us today that it’s still February…the wind is absolutely howling at the moment and the temperature is supposed to drop to 18 degrees tonight. Oh well, it IS February, after all. It was just nice to get those two days as a preview and the cold is not supposed to stay too long anyway.

Well, I think I’ve written enough for one day. I really need to stop skipping days because then I give you readers too much to read, lol. I think it’s time to get to work on writing that I get paid to do. The mouth is healing nicely, by the way. As always, thanks for reading and enjoy Whitney!

Whitney Houston - "I Wanna Dance with Somebody"

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